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Now THIS is forty.

April 27, 2016

In a few days I turn 41.  I will officially be in my forties.  While I don’t love every aspect of getting older, I must say there are some definite perks.  And after all, the alternative seriously blows.

Being “middle aged” is freeing.  The shit that weighed down my 20’s and 30’s seems noticeably lighter. This stage of life brings with it some beautiful changes.  To name a few…

I care less about things that don’t matter and more about things that do.  People matter, things don’t.  Being true to myself matters, the status quo doesn’t.  Bringing Pinterest-worthy, hand baked treats to my child’s holiday party doesn’t matter, showing up does.

I’m now perfectly comfortable standing up for myself and voicing my opinion, even if it’s unpopular.  I don’t seek out conflict, but I no longer avoid it, either.  Honesty is freeing as f*ck.

I don’t need everyone to like me or agree with me.  I can’t please everyone.  I’m not pizza for Pete’s sake.

I’m less concerned with how my body, house, clothes, LIFE look on the outside.  I’m more concerned with being healthy, creating a welcoming place to spend time with people I care about, being comfortable, and doing what fulfills me.  On the inside.

I’m better now at multitasking but less worried about getting it all done.  I realize I won’t ever get it all done and I’m okay with that.  Really.

My friendships with other women are deeper, richer, more authentic.  I no longer care about impressing or competing with anyone. I care about building relationships that matter with people who like and accept the real me, flaws and all, and who aren’t afraid to show me their truth.

I laugh more and harder.  I’m not afraid to be goofy, not worried about looking stupid or uncool.  Frankly, I’m having too damn much fun to care.

I embrace my inner (and outer!) geek.  I embrace other people’s inner geeks.  I want my kids to be geeks.  Geeks rule.

I recognize the importance, the necessity of self care.  I know that sleeping well, reading good books, meditating, exercising, eating good food, and laughing with friends are all imperative for me.  I make time for them.  Regularly.

So for those of you who fear aging, who desperately try to stave off the passing of time, I say STOP.  Look around.  The view is pretty damn beautiful up here if you look past the crow’s feet and back pains.

With life experience comes appreciation for how very precious it all is.  Love yourselves fiercely.  Love the people in your life with abandon.  Love the gift of passing time on this great big spinning ball.  Some things just get better with age; life is one of them.  Salut, y’all!


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